My Truth

I am a slave
because that is what I need
It is what I must be for order to reign
in my world, in this reality around me
which threatens constantly to rend me
and change me, to mold me into something I am not
without regard for the fact
that I have found at the basest levels of myself
that I am a slave
All the education and knowledge in the world
cannot undo what I am in my darkest moment
in my brightest moments, I am
an animal, reacting on instinct
led by million of years of
DNA coding and genes dating back
to the most primal of times
and the fact that I can think
that I know a great many things
cannot undo my animal mind

I hunger, my basest needs must be met
Lest I fall into a whirlwind
of my own undoing
my intelligent mind failing me
in my moments of need
I am no more than a beast and
like any wild animal, I can never be completely tamed
I will fight and claw and bite
If cornered, I will make my way through you
rending you until in my bloodlust
I find myself quenched, devoid of fear
or anger, simply being, at peace
until my mind returns once more
All of the opinions and shade in this world
cannot hide from me, my sacred truth
who and what I am
I cannot run through the forests, lost to my kind
because though they are not truly my kind
I am not permitted to live as my soul would live
in a world run by those who can never see me
for what I truly am

I have no wish to rule, to succeed by means of outdoing another
I have no drive to be better than my neighbor
to own the best car or to own this world
that I can only both love and despise
I am an animal in human skin
living amongst those who cannot see
what I see when I look around me
My mind, going slowly mad
caged in this body, in this place
my only cure is a strong hand
providing for my animal needs
dominating my mind that it can be clear
that I might think and act
my beast satisfied, quiet, asleep
waiting to awake once more
to crash against walls which will not yield
and to exalt in their strength
the only thing that I, as an animal
can respect and trust
what I feel, what I see
touched by strength with wisdom to know
that when my teeth are bared
that they cannot be trusted
not to bite the hand that feeds them
that force is my remedy
an iron will, my desperate need
the only one who knows me
who sees me and loves me
for what I truly am.

I am a slut, an empty hole
that needs to be filled completely
in order to feel whole
aching at it’s basest level
until my mind can take no more
I am an animal, a beast
to your pleasure, to my lust
and I cannot change this
There is no technology, no medication
that can change what I am
It does not matter what I wish to be
what I could be if only I were not
this beast, because it is what I am
and no matter how many times
I cover it up or hide it
or seek to restrain it
It will come back stronger, mightier, with a greater hunger
and so I embrace it fully
holding it to me as a lover, as my beloved
for it is me in all of my glory
in all of my shame
I am a slave
and I can apologize no longer
 for what I am or what I need

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This material and writing is copyrighted. Any reproduction of it in part or in it’s entirety without my express permission is prohibited.

Lady Stromfield

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